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Sounders News

As a soccer fan, I am excited by the prospect of pro soccer being here in Seattle next year. And the news I saw today really got me jazzed:

Former Swedish national team captain Fredrik Ljungberg has signed with the Seattle Sounders FC. He’s the fourth player signed by the expansion Major League Soccer team. The midfielder previously played for Arsenal and West Ham United in the English Premier League. He’s a two-time player of the year in Sweden and has played in two World Cups.

I heart Freddy. He is a dynamo to watch, and I know he’ll make a great addition to the team.

posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,Jet City News and have Comment (1)

About Face.

Thank god the MLS powers that be woke up and smelled the Starbucks. The new team name is the Seattle Sounders FC.

The original choices were, gag, “Seattle Alliance, Seattle Republic and Seattle FC”. WTFF are those names? Totally bland, no connection AT ALL to the area. Absolutely retarded.

This quote made me laugh:

“It was a groundswell,” majority owner and Hollywood producer Joe Roth said of the Sounders sentiment.

No KIDDING… what the hell did you think the public would do when presented with such lame-ass choices?

Still, near-name fiasco aside, I’m glad to see Major League Soccer coming to Seattle. Can’t wait to see the games live.

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,Jet City News and have No Comments

Worse Than Rickets & Scurvy

So, when she left, Bayou entrusted our dear friend and fellow blogger, Uppity with ensuring I didn’t die of starvation.

Lachlan isn’t able to make the trip with us so those of you who are close, try to make sure she eats more than grapenuts. You know I’m talking to you, Uppity! ;)

Uppity replied that she’d try to make sure neither of us ended up with scurvy or rickets. Well, I think what I’m experiencing is way worse than either of those thankfully now-rare diseases. Read more…

posted by Lachlan in Blogsploitation,Goaaaaal!,The Devil Duck Tales and have Comments (7)

Aren’t We Adults?

I’m talking about the women on my soccer team. Aren’t we all over the age of 25 and, don’t we have the ability to know our own schedules?

God, I’m pissed off. And I don’t even have PMS to blame for some of my anger.

We pay to play, if I’ve failed to make that clear in past posts. We don’t have the luxury of just showing up to play anywhere and having a field open for our use- we have to pay (a LOT of) money, deal with the schedules given to us, and play the teams we’re told to play. That’s what being in a league is about.

And being part of that league, and that team within the league, means you show up when you have games. It means you know where the fucking hell the fields are, or make sure you have directions.

Playing is about leisure time. It’s about running and being with people you enjoy and having fun. It’s NOT about playing short and having to beg two passersby to play. It’s not about having to run your ass off ten times harder because 3 or 4 people couldn’t be bothered to A) let us know they weren’t coming and B) god forbid, find their own subs.

Thanks for nothing, you lazy bitches. I love you all dearly, but DAMN. The rest of us who make the effort, week in and week out, deserve to have advance warning if you can’t be there.

We still won. 5-3. With no regular goalie, a half-assed defense, and an offense that had to play way too much defense. And with two college-age passersby who wanted to have a little fun.

Thanks, ladies. You were life savers.

I’m glad we have a bye next week, otherwise I might still be mad enough by next Tuesday to rant in person.

And yes, I maintained my season-long streak of a goal and/or an assist every game so far, thankyouverymuch. One of each tonight, in fact. No thanks to the aforementioned lazy bitches.

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,The Devil Duck Tales and have Comments (4)

What Do You Do…

…when you love your sport, but it doesn’t love you back?

Or, more accurately, what do you do when it tears your body to shreds, no matter how much love and adoration and effort you shower upon it? Read more…

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,The Devil Duck Tales and have Comments (7)

We Have A Saying ‘Round Here

Every Sunday or Tuesday, a little ritual plays out in my house.

I get dressed and ready for soccer.

I tell my lovely not legally recognized but certainly socially recognized wife I’m leaving.

She looks at me, smiles, and says “Hat-trick.”

I smile, and sometimes sigh, and say “Yes ma’am.” I always try to deliver, of course. Tonight was no exception. Two goals and two assists. Not bad for an aging weekend/night warrior.

Should’ve been three, but I hurried myself a tad and pulled too hard to the left, missing the inside of the post by about 3in.

Next week. And I guarantee you, the same conversation will happen again, as it does every week. This is one routine I love.

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,The Devil Duck Tales and have Comments (3)

Talk About Tempting Fate

Well, more accurately, tempting FIFA:

Juventus formally notified an administrative court in Rome that it will appeal its sentence in a match-fixing scandal — despite the Italian soccer federation warning it could trigger more disciplinary action.

The news agency ANSA reported that Juventus had filed its appeal on Thursday, but club spokesman Roberto Patriarca told The Associated Press that the club had only notified the civil court.

“Juventus has sent a notification of its intention to appeal,” Patriarca said. “In the next few days the physical appeal will be lodged.”

FIFA on Wednesday threatened to suspend World Cup champion Italy and all Italian clubs from international competition should Juventus appeal to a civil court, prompting the Italian soccer federation’s warning.

I hope FIFA does it; they got nailed, demoted, and disgraced. Now it seems they’re bent on screwing every single Italian player out there. Good job, guys. Seems like a brilliant way to handle things.

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,Int'l News-ishness,Sports-speak and have No Comments

The Bitch Is Back, Baby.

Back on the pitch, that is.

For the first time since I had my near meltdown in Janauary, leading to this post in March, I played soccer. And it felt great.

Despite six months off, I had my usual deft touch on the ball, good shots on goal (scoring once), and accurate passes. Not bad for someone growing silver hair and recovering from a bout of ill health. Which brings me to the update. Read more…

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,The Devil Duck Tales and have Comments (5)

I Fought The Soccer Ball…

…and the soccer ball won, panels-down.

My luck with all things physical has not been good lately. In fact, I have felt downright cruddy for a few months. Nothing a vacation, a change in diet, and a hefy payraise wouldn’t fix, but that’s neither here nor there.

No, last night, I was face to face with my own ball, and not in a pleasant way. I pressured a defender to get rid of the ball, and she did- right into my lips. I felt my jaw crackle-pop like a knuckle and pain shot into both my ears. And that was before I did the face-plant.

Today, I am not particularly talkative (imagine that), and have been ribbed mercilessly by my coworkers. Joy. I can dish, and I can take it, but I don’t like taking it quite so silently.

I think perhaps it is time for me to go back to martial arts. I never got hurt doing that!

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal! and have No Comments

We Made It!

Way to go, Seahawks!

Sorry, Ace. Looks like my prediction of a Steelers-Seahawks Super Bowl came true, after all. Despite many naysayers out there in the media. Like a certain writer at a certain online mag who shall remain nameless.

I’m still kinda in shock, really. Seattle has been waiting a very long time for this day, and I know the entire city is whooping it up as I type away.

Way to bring a classy A-level game tonight, guys. And Carolina- you’ve had a helluva season. You should be proud. You were a worthy opponent, and I look forward to seeing what Jake & Co can do next year.

That said: Detroit, here we come!

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posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,US News-ishness and have Comment (1)

Of Goals And Household Mishaps

Things have been a bit hectic in our neck of the woods the past week. I feel like I’ve lost all sense of time and need a scorecard to keep track of appointments, events, and must-do lists. And no matter how much one might try to prepare, it always seems that this time of year is full up on “stuff”.

Gooooooal- Ohh, Err. Not.

Yesterday was my Tuesday soccer team’s championship game. Our record prior to yesterday was 9 wins, 0 losses, and 1 tie. The one tie was against the team we played yesterday. And after 90 minutes of what I like to term “pinball”, we racked up another tie, 0-0. But because of our superior record (including a goal differential, calculated based on how many goals scored and how many scored against us), we are still the Champions. Booorah, Headers! We rock. The scariest moment in the game was a penalty kick against us which thank jeebus, our kickass goalie Annie blocked. And then blocked a rebound attempt seconds later. She’s got my vote for MVP of the Season.

Of course, I had to take my usual beating during the game. My legs look like a bomb went off at my feet. I have more bruises than I have freckles. But, we’re off until at least the 8th of January, so I’ve got time to heal. And get fat and out of shape, too, so it’s a split decision. I hate the time off, but do enjoy the extra evening I get during the week.

The DVR, aka “Damnable Vexing Recorder”

Not quite two weeks ago, we ordered a DVR from Comcrap Comcast to be part of the “in” crowd who tapes their shows. (Because dog knows we need to sit in front of the tv, eat, and be generally vegetative.) However, I did something lamebrained and in retrospect, I have no idea what I was thinking.

I opted to install it, rather than have the cable company do it. Brilliant.

And thus the reason it sat for nearly two weeks. We couldn’t decipher the hieroglyphic-like instructions. It also didn’t help that we were given cables for an HDTV-ready tv, which we do not have and expressly told the morons at Comcastic we did not have.

But help came in the form of our buddy JMac, who for dinner and some yummy Bordeaux, hooked it up.

Of course, nothing is ever that simple. Despite JMac’s incredible expertise, something is wrong with the audio. About every 10-15 seconds there is this chirping/skipping noise, which totally ruins the viewing experience. And here I sit on my Sunday, awaiting the arrival of the Comidiot technician to fix the problem.

Christmas Notes, a la Lachlan

Some of my longtime readers know that I used to be quite Scroogish when it came to this time of year. I’ve either had a revelation or an undiagnosed head injury, because I am actually looking forward to the holidays. Maybe it’s my advancing years, or whatever. All I know is I find myself wishing it would snow, I’m not dreading gift buying (except for the “I’m broke as hell” aspect of things), and I am not totally sick over the fact that Bayou is going home. Things are shaping up to create a nice holiday season, I think. I know Bayou’s Christmas will be a bit more exciting, but I’m ok with it being sedate and solitary ’round here. Given the pace of work, I expect some quiet time will be beneficial before the clean-up that is January begins.

Because One Can Never Have Too Many Broken Electronics.

The final verdict on my pc? Deeeeeaaaaaaad. Dead, dead, dead. The 250g hard drive I brought (whose warranty died in June) is bad. I always suspected there was something funky with it, and now I am kicking myself for not returning it sooner. $200 or whatever it was down the drain. My lovely, wonderful, perfect iBook is running like a top, however. So I am set- until I want to upgrade said iBook, hehe. Which given the deadness of the big ol’ hard drive that never was, will probably be sooner than later.

And that’s all the boring news from here. What’s happening in your neck of the woods?

posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal!,The Devil Duck Tales and have Comments (4)

Hat-Trickery And Other Adventures

It was the best of games, it was the worst of games. All in the space of 90 minutes. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop being confounded by last night’s game.

My Tuesday team that has steamrolled our every opponent walked onto the field like a bunch of women who had never even kicked a soccer ball before. We stood flatfooted while the other team intercepted passes. We passed to them as opposed to our players. We didn’t trap or control the ball. In short, we sucked worse than a bunch of three year olds hyped up on sugar who don’t even know which goal they’re supposed to shoot at.

I was playing forward, and just stood back watching the chaos unfurl wondering “Who the hell ARE these people, and what have they done with my team?” I was no better. I couldn’t get open or make a decent shot at all. Then, they scored off a weak play that was created by an even weaker defense. Everything definitely seemed lost.

Tweeeeet! Halftime. Some restrategizing was in order. We sussed out some changes, moved a few people around, and then thank god, we got another player, one of our best. Brianna is a center mid, who can control and distribute the ball like no other. She has poise and she knows where to look. I felt a small surge of hope.

We took the field, and I sat out. Play resumed, and I could immediately see we were playing more to our normal level. We had the ball on their end of the field a lot. What I saw next however immediately worried me.

The ball ricocheted in a weird pinball fashion between a defender and my forward, Andie. As soon as it hit her in the face, she dropped to one knee. I could sense it was bad. There was a brief huddle and a wave for a replacement. I came bck onto the field with 13 minutes left in the game.

Andie went to the bench, and I overheard someone say she couldn’t see. Crap, a detached retina?, I thought. We have a nurse who looked her over, and they decided she ought to hit the ER immediately. She could see a pinhole of light, but that was all, nothing was clear.

That did it for me. I was galvanized. The ref ordered a drop ball, and I told the other team it was theirs. I passed it to their keeper, and we got back to business.

Oh boy, did we ever. Read more…

posted by Lachlan in Goaaaaal! and have Comments (2)